Pondering

Today my grandma who is going to be 90 is having eye surgery. She got a bad virus in her eye about a year ago that attacked it pretty bad and left her blind. It eye has done nothing but hurt ever since. Then just recently she got another virus that attacked it again, and left her with a more infections and pain. She has gone to the Dr. a few times and they have recommended to her that she remove her eye. Mind you they are talking to a lady who has always worn lipstick to bed!! After lots of  thought she has decided to remove a part of her eye the middle part and have a fake middle put in. She is courageous! I'm 36 and am putting off eye surgery until I absolutely have to have it.
That is what has led me to my pondering today. My grandpa has been dead almost 11 years, and for 11 years my grandma has wanted nothing more than to die. She has sat back and had to watch just about everyone from her family and my grandpas family die. She sits and wonders why God doesn't take her. She has had so many issues and she is so full of pain that all she wants to do is die. But yet she is still here. Don't get me wrong I love that she is still here. I have always told her she was going to live to see my boy's marry and go on missions. I think she might just do it. But I can't help but wonder myself how much does a person have to endure. I can't believe that there is much more for her to learn. She is dang near perfect!! She has been for years.
My grandma is my role model!! She has worked hard her whole life and she hasn't had and easy life. Even though now she has a little negative attitude I think that's ok when you are 90.  I love her so much and have hated to see her in so much pain. I hope today this will end well and doesn't cause her more pain like her 2 knees did. She replaced both knees about 4 years ago and was told that once she did that her pain in her legs and back would go away. Well it didn't it has gotten worse. So I hope this ends well today.
I am so grateful that I have the relationship I do with her. She is an amazing woman. I am so glad that my kids are close to her and that they are her favorite!!
I know the day will come when she is no longer with us, and that is going to be ok. She has lived a great life!