Lessons Im learning

It seems like I am learning so many lessons lately. One that has been the most important is realizing that my sons choices aren't from bad parenting. They are from him choosing to use his free agency. Years ago it seems like that this particular son and I had a very good relationship. We talked about everything. Most the time I was in awe that he felt comfortable talking to me about the things he did. Back then I thought my child was perfect and life was great!! I had awesome kids. That would never try drugs, or get into sex, or lie to me. We were going to BFF"S forever!!
Because I got pregnant when I was 17 I have been very open with my kids. Both Josh and I have. We have told them that they don't want to go down that road, it is a very hard one. They have seen some of the struggles that we have had. We have told them that they should not have sex until they are married and that they should stay away from drugs and alcohol that they destroy lives.
We have had detailed conversations about all of these topics, because we have had some hard trials in our lives that we have had to deal with.
About 2years ago our Stake President talked to all the parents in the ward and said if you think your kids aren't doing it they are meaning drugs, alcohol and sex. I was blind and said to myself whatever, not my kids. It seems like after that talk my eyes were opened. I found that even though my oldest talked to me about EVERYTHING, that he was lying about most of the things he was doing. He would lie right up until he got caught. That seems to be how it has gone for a year now. I think he is doing good and then Boom something new comes up.
The lesson I am learning is to stay calm, and let him know that he is loved. That I don't agree with his decisions and that I am sorry life is going to suck for him because there are consequences wether from me or from his actions. And sometimes you have consequences that will last the rest of your life. It is so hard to watch things happen. I am a control freak and want to ground him to his room and never let him leave the house again. I want to make it so he can never have another girl friend and dump the one he has, but I know what doing that would do.
I know that God knows and loves him. He knows what path my son will choose. Its not on my time but his. I just have to pray, have faith and be patient!!